The Suicide Letter

Help me forget my life.

My weekends, consist mostly of getting high, watching bad movies, and binging on brownies.

Make me forget all the horrible, nasty thoughts, that crossed through my mind this week. All of the improper and socially unacceptable things I've said out loud in fits of anger and fatigue.

The nights seem longer then previous years as the bitter cold creeps back in to our lives to inhabit us once again and run a muck.

Last week I wrote my own suicide letter. 

I had no intention of publishing it or carrying the deed out, but I was so grief struck, that I wanted to see if I had it in me. 

I re-read it this week to get an idea of how horribly un-educational the entire thing was. To my surprise it was actually well written.  It might actually be one of the best pieces of work I've created in a long time. Not because of its morbid content, but because it was written with empathy, drive and purpose. It covered all the finer points in my life, while managing to avoid self pity. If I were to read it from an outsiders perspective I would understand its purpose and feel no shame if they wrote the same.

Sometimes actions don't need justifications. There are few tragic circumstances that happen for reasons we later understand.

This is one of those moments.