Rippling Pools.

Like a clock winding in reverse
and a maiden running slowly down a white hall
I feel the creativity slowly coming to an end

My brain is swelled with regret
and images of horror
that lead to angered thoughts.

To be young,
careless,
and naive again.

Last night I dreamt of days spent at the local swimming complex.
The high dive threatening me with a challenge
and the fear I felt as I climbed those infinite stairs.

Walking to the edge,
and thinking the world was watching me,
expecting a significant show.

I would always stand stiff,
arms at my side,
as my body cut through the chlorine bleached water,
and sunk to the bottom of the endless pool.

Fear crippled me as I swam to the surface for air,
except this time I couldn't reach it,
and I drowned,
watching the splashing kicks from my peers around me,
and the older man who had been watching me from a distance diving in to save me.

He hadn't taken an interest or a liking to any of the other children that day,
and back then I took him as a kind friend.

A savior.

The first person I had kissed,
and felt unnatural feelings for,
that would only later be explained to me in an unorthodox way,
and change my life forever.