A Voided Letter

Sasha,

I hope everything's all right.

I thought of you today while brushing my hair. Pieces of me have begun to break away and flutter to the ground. My nails have hardened and split, while my legs grow weak. I gasped at the piles of skin I've left behind and yet, realize it is long overdue. After all, if you inject as much as we have in our veins, a bodies bound to break. 

You were the only one who understood it though. Our out of body highs that pushed us that much closer to Nirvana. It almost seemed like a race.

You never believed in the after life anyway. Why would you? Of all the terrible and benevolent things you've experienced in this world, how could some god sit back and allow it all to happen?

The void.

That is what I'm most afraid of.

An empty pit of nothing, where your thoughts, fears, and love cease to exist. I can't wrap my head around it. If that's what death means, then why bother with the human race? Something brought us into this world. It sure as hell doesn't make sense that when we pass, there's nothing.

Sometimes I sit on my porch, reflecting on all the things I've accomplished in life and cry. Not because I'm unhappy or sad. Mostly because you've beaten me at the one thing I was sure I would accomplish first.

I love you dear friend.


I hope to see you real soon.

-B